I had a list of things I wanted to mention that I found in my pocket.

It said:

1. Hi, Yes
2. Dictionary (Recommended)
3. God
4. Iggy Pop

Now, I can't really think of a way to string these thoughts together coherently, so instead I'm just going to present my stupid brain in list form.

Here goes.

1. This is another part of my "retail is weird" series: As it gets closer to Christmas, customers always treat you as less and less of a person, but the weirdest part is definitely when they forgo the common human courtesy of saying "Hello" or "Goodbye." I don't think they realize how strange it feels to walk up to someone and say "Hi!" only to have them respond "I'm looking for cookbooks." The most common occurrence of this phenomena is what I'm beginning to refer to as the hello-yes problem. You walk up to someone and say "Hello," and they respond with "Yes." They then usually, but not always, follow up with what they want from you. Another example of this mentality is the people who hang up the phone on you after you've answered their question without saying goodbye, leaving you saying "Hello? Hello?" into the mouthpiece and getting quizzical looks from your manager. Here's a good story: The other day I was at the front of the store straightening and I had a man walk up to me and say "Dogs." I had my back turned to him at the time, so I turned around, looked at him confused and said "Sorry?" He then repeated: "Dogs." I blinked and stared at him for a second before I said "You're looking for books about dogs?" He just stared back, so I then took him to the Pets section and showed him the area where we keep the dog books, at which point he said "Okay." and I stood there awkwardly for a minute before walking away and going back to what I was doing. It should be pointed out that this man did not appear to be in ANY WAY mentally challenged. He was in nice clothes, and looked otherwise intelligent.

2. Another weird retail thing: I've been asked THREE TIMES this week - and I am SO not making this up - I've been asked THREE TIMES "Which of these dictionaries is the best?" I cannot for the life of me even come up with a witty response to that question. If you have any ideas, email me at adhesiveslipper@headhat.net.

3. I had a little epiphany the other day, and it's nothing big or important. However, if God made man in His own image, it seems that God must be as flawed as we are. Which was a strange feeling at the time.

4. This is the only music-related one. I was listening to Cex, and thinking about the way he often complains about his voice (which is something I can sort of relate to), and I was reminded of something I heard Iggy Pop say about the Velvet Underground. He said "I was watching them, and all I could think was 'That guy CAN'T SING... I can't sing... LET'S SING!'" I'm wondering if I'm brave enough to put some vocals on my next album. I guess you'll all find out when it's done.

Okay, that's all. Sorry.